Different Types of Anger

 

As humans we don’t like to deal with anger and therefore it doesn’t always manifest from the outside and can be more subtle and hard to recognise.

The first type is the aggressive and short tempered approach to anger. This can result in others not feeling comfortable speaking their minds and the aggressive people feeling ignored and lonely.

The second type is those who keep their anger internalised. From the outside these people appear t be easy-going, but only because they hide their true feelings. This passive face of anger often leads to serious health problems as their angry feelings turn inward.

The third type is passive-aggressive anger. Passive-aggressive people come across as composed and instead of talking about it, they hold on to their anger and let it fester. This can result in these types of people, withholding information or making decisions without working through the issue.

Which face of anger do you show most often? Sometimes we have different styles at different times or places. For example, we might be aggressive at work and passive aggressive at home. If you wish to learn more, here is a list of possible emotional indicators.

If you express your anger directly and aggressively you may experience the following:

Physically:

  • increased and fast heart rate
  • shaking or trembling
  • behaving in an abusive way
  • pacing
  • sweating, in particular your palms
  • starting to yell, scream or cry
  • redness in the neck/face

 

Emotionally:

  • rage
  • anxiety
  • wanting to hit out verbally or physically
  • feeling out of control
  • resentment

 

If you express it passive aggressively you have learned not to allow yourself to feel anger:

 

Physically:

  • Using sarcasm
  • Rubbing your head
  • Becoming silent or not engaging
  • An urge to remove yourself from the situation
  • Isolating
  • Compulsive eating, spending, cleaning or sex
  • Feeling revengeful
  • Denying or rationalising your behaviour

 

Emotionally you may feel:

  • Irritated
  • Resentful
  • Fearful
  • Dominated
  • Powerless
  • Sad or depressed
  • Guilty

 

If you express your anger in a passive way, you may feel:

 

Physically:

  • Clenching your jaws or grinding your teeth
  • Headache
  • Sore stomach
  • Self- harm, such as, biting nails, hitting something with bare fist, banging your head, etc.
  • Increased and faster heart rate
  • Dizziness
  • An urge to cry
  • Compulsive eating, spending, cleaning or sex

 

Emotionally you may feel:

  • Self-hate
  • Stupid
  • Bad
  • Sad or depressed
  • Guilty

 

There is one other type of anger: the assertive style. This is when you do not feel threatened by conflict and don’t take it personally. You don’t jump to conclusions; instead you ask more questions before responding. You offer the benefit of the doubt and believe that it is possible to work out any challenges.